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IT is tough when our child’s spouse/partner is causing issues. I have a friend with the same problem and it hurts her as much as it does the son. I also have a friend staying in an abusive marriage supposedly “for the sake of the kids”. I’ve told her several times to get to a decent lawyer and she does have a decent job and only one kid that is financially dependent and a teenager at that so even though it would be work it would be worth the peace of mind and personal safety. I told her to live in peace would be much better than staying in such a toxic situation but she’s too scared to go. Another neighbour of ours got smart. She has two tiny kids and left her hubby this fall suddenly one day. I suspected that that was an abusive situation as well as she went around with a bandaged up arm for months and I always heard the kids crying a lot. All I can say is good for her.
I wouldn’t be surprised if some of the marriage stress is causing your son’s health issues. Keep us posted.