Homepage – Forum › Forums › Muscle Invasive Bladder Cancer › My mom is facing a radical cystectomy › Reply To: My mom is facing a radical cystectomy
Hi Sandy. Sorry your mom is facing such surgery. Dr Shayegan is renowned on this site as a wonderful surgeon, however, so if the surgery is necessary, he’s the guy in the OR you want to be in with! Post op is hard, there are no two ways around that. But home care is set up from the hospital (at least it was in my case). Good thing to speak with someone at the hospital about, however.
The thing about anxiety is that it is going to be there whether or not she has the surgery since if she does not have it, the outcome is not what is desired. So she either has to live with the cancer for as long as she is able or she has to have the surgery which brings its own worries. The proverbial “caught between a rock and a hard place.”
So your mother has:
One of the best surgeons.
One of the best major cancer centres.
Comprehensive home care available at no cost.
A loving daughter (at least) for support and care who also happens to be a nurse (big plus).
Those four things you need not worry about.
The unknowns are:
How she will tolerate the surgery.
What complications may arise (infection is common as is constipation and significant weight loss, etc.).
How will she react to feeling so weak and lethargic for weeks afterwards even with no complications.
Unfortunately, there are no ways to know until the surgery happens. Then the only thing to do is take it a day at a time and be thankful everyday for each other.
We are hear to listen, to offer support, to encourage, to even make you smile on occasion. And we will also pray for her and you. Often that’s the only answer to anxiety.
Greg